Wednesday, November 30, 2022
Wednesday, November 30, 2022

    76ers Exile Al Horford, Sis SLAMMED for Saying Philly Sucks: ‘Thank God He’s Gone … Helped Us Do Absolutely Nothing’

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    The 76ers traded Al Horford and a first-round and second-round pick to the Thunder for Danny Green, sources tell Adrian Wojnarowski, and Your Content has learned Philadelphians have declared the trade a major victory—with some saying Horford ‘helped’ the team ‘do absolutely nothing.’

    “Al Horford thank God you’re gone. You helped us do absolutely nothing.” tweeted Jordy.

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    It was announced Tuesday that the 76ers traded Horford more than a year after he was considered a ballyhooed free-agent signing away for their rival Boston Celtics. According to CBS Philadelphia, the newcomer was a flop in the first season of a four-year contract worth $97 million and lost his starting spot late in the season.

    Sean McMenamin tweeted: “I’m so happy with this trade.

    “Thank god Al Horford is gone and we have a great shooter in Danny Green. Phenomenal first move Mr. Morey!”

    Other locals experienced bursts of excitement and joy—citing fantasy football hurdles they now avoid.

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    “Thank god I don’t need to go through the pain of trying to find a good trade for Al Horford on MyLeague,” LeRascas declared.

    The erratic behavior of the out-of-town temporary team figurine comes on the heels of the heated on-going presidential election—and many city residents now believe they will have a good nights rest, according to their comical social media quips.

    “Now that the election is over it’s time to focus on the fundamental issues affecting this nation: trading Al Horford” brazen Philly native Chartisse tweeted on Nov. 6.

    Sarah Snyder slipped a wisecrack of her own—declaring the Biden administration must take responsibility for handling the nuclear athlete.

    “In exchange for Philadelphia winning Biden this election, any [NBA] team must accept the Al Horford for their best player deal.” Sarah dished.

    That’s when Anna Horford, sister to Al, declared the city of Philadelphia simply ‘sucks’ due to the ‘miserable fans.’

    “Pretending to fw Philly was EXHAUSTING. The most miserable fans in the NBA.” tweeted Anna Horford.

    “YOU MAD!” Brandon Carbone replied.

    Horford, 34, signed a four-year, $109 million contract with Philadelphia as a free agent last summer, as the Sixers hoped the combination of prying him away from their blood rivals, the Boston Celtics, ESPN reported.

    To the contrary, the fit between the two was clunky from the start and never improved, to the point where Horford was removed from the starting lineup for the first time in his career in favor of second-year guard Shake Milton, ESPN continued.

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